It’s hard to believe it’s been nearly 5 months since I made my big “Run-up To 60” announcement! Where does the time go?! When I made that announcement, I was hoping I’d have it in me to do more regular updates, but here I am…giving myself yet another opportunity to practice self-compassion! And maybe that’s the biggest step I’ve taken so far in this run-up to 60… That I can now, instead of beating myself up for not doing something, see it as an opportunity to be a kinder, more loving person to myself.
I think for many women my age, self-compassion doesn’t come easily. Maybe we were raised by heavy-handed parents, or were in families or peer groups where perfection was expected and excellence was tolerated. But, if you aren’t allowed to make a mistake without some sort of over-the-top reprimand, how do you learn to have compassion for yourself? I don’t think you do…
And that’s where I am – approaching 60 and still figuring out how to have self-compassion. Approaching 60 and finally noticing the consequences that the absence of self-compassion has had on my life. You see, the more I beat myself up for not being perfect, or not doing something “perfectly”, the smaller the box I live in has gotten. The fear of trying something new or different, of putting myself out there has been paralyzing. Fear of ‘looking stupid’ or making a mistake has prevented me from trying all sorts of things…until recently.
Over the past several months, I’ve been deliberately trying new things…stretching myself, testing myself. Baby step by baby step I’ve stepped up and “given it a go”… trying everything from “NeuroArt”, and rock painting to Cricut crafting, art journalling and even jumping in a bouncy castle! (and yes, I HAVE to do that again!)
Like Jim Carrey in the movie “Yes Man”, I am saying yes to more and more experiences and in doing so, I am tackling my fears and growing my self-compassion. And, perhaps most importantly, I’m moving the walls of my self-imposed box and learning how to have fun again!
Does fear hold you back from trying new things? Do you struggle with self-compassion? I’d love to hear your thoughts on these ideas!
1 Response to "Run-Up to 60 – Check In #1"
Self-compassion is an interesting perspective. It is much easier to feel compassion for others, because that is how we are raised, but you are right, what about compassion for me by me? Maybe if I felt more self-compassiin I’d sleep better!!!